It's so weird how things work out and the timing of certain events. I had 3 different situations last week where different friends and I discussed the issue of forgiveness in relationships, or just simply how to deal with strained or difficult relationships. Got me thinkin' what's expected of a Christian when it comes to forgiveness and the idea of "forgive & forget"?
In my thinking and researching the topic of forgiveness I found interesting answers at http://www.gotquestions.org/. It's a site that you can search topical questions and the answers are given according to what the Bible says. Disclaimer: I've NOT done massive research into the site to assure it completely aligns with all my beliefs, but the verses shared on my searches seemed to be very good.
It was interesting to me how issues with forgiveness seem to be all around me, yet I wasn't personally struggling with forgiveness issues of my own. Until.......of course! God has interesting timing. I wish I had blogged my thoughts earlier in the week because then I could have looked back at what my thoughts were on the subject PRIOR to my "moment" of drama this week.
What I've "learned" about forgiveness:
1. You forgive for yourself- to set yourself free.
2. Forgiveness makes me feel exposed, vulnerable and open to another "attack".
3. Forgiveness is easier to do if the "offender" comes seeking it or if there's a perceived chance that the person will change! Duh!
4. You can't go through the Express Forgiveness Checkout Lane. It's not a one time deal. Forgiving someone can take multiple attempts and sometimes only happens over a period of time.
5. "Forgive & Forget" is not really realistic. Forgiving is achievable yes and should be done over and over again, forgetting not so much. When forgiving someone you should continue on toward the future leaving the "offense" in the past. You can't erase the event, but should make a constant effort to leave it behind. God grants us full forgiveness from our sins and doesn't keep account- leaving it in our past. (Hebrews 8:12) Can you imagine? We seek his repentance, He forgives us full well knowing not only if, but when we'll sin again!! And to think I forgive, yet worry about future "attacks"!!??
6. Pray. Pray for the "offender". (Matthew 5:44) Pray for your own heart. It's only by the power of the Holy Spirit that our heart can be changed to consider others as worth of the love and compassion that we ourselves have been granted.
In closing: Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Ephesians 4:32 (NIV)
So there's my random thoughts on my "lesson" this week. Hopefully documenting this will help me one day down the road when I'm struggling...
Thursday, April 23, 2009
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